One of the most difficult things I had to deal, with was my
siblings. For some reason many of them didn’t undertand what
a difficult job it was to care for our parents 24/7.
Mom had dementia and bad knees so she couldn’t take herself
to the bathroom. I had to be available to help her, and that was
often. She needed total ADL’s, so I needed to be there. I got up
in the middle of the night to take care of her every night.
I gave up my own apartment and my freedom to keep a promise
I made to my Dad, that I would help him and Mom stay at home
until they both died.
He thanked me for that before he died but, for some reason, many of my siblings don’t seem to care
about that and refuse to respond to any of my communications to them.
I used what averaged out to $250 a month of my parent’s money to cover my own expenses and to try
to prepare for my life after they died, and they think that was stealing. I think it was generous
because I lost $180,000 in lost wages and provided nursing services that would have cost us or the
state of New York about $1,000,000, if they had gone to a nursing home for those five years.
So, hell, I love them anyway but I know that there are probably many caregivers who have to face
similar circumstances, so I setup a Facebook Group to provide emotional support and networking.
If this would serve you or if you would like to emotionally support caregivers, you are welcome to join.
I will be making more resources available to support caregivers and look forward to hearing your